Feeling good and growing hair!

I have been doing really good and I am feeling so energetic! It’s nice to feel good. I know a lot has to do with having baby Jeffrey around to snuggle on whenever I want to. He is just an absolute doll. All he does is  eats, sleeps, and poops at this stage! That’s it! He is starting to have a little more awake time in between feeding and I love holding him and looking into his eyes wondering if he can see me and I keep saying, “I’m Grandma”.

I have been getting the camper ready for our camping trip. I can’t wait to go.  Pam, Mike and my mom, and Sue and Steve are going too. Our campers are all in a row. It is right on Lake Michigan. I am really looking forward to it.

I have Bonnie all set with the bottle routine and things like that. I love making the bottles for her though. I remember when Jeffrey was born I used glass bottles and had a steam sterilizer that I would cram everything into. She is doing the platex drop ins and they are so easy. We just boil some water and put the nipples and caps in and drop in the liner and then were done! That’s it! I had them when Megan was born but they are still a lot easier now the when she was born. The gadgets they have now are unbelievable. I used to have a swing that cranked up and Megan would just fall asleep in it and it would stop swinging so would walk over and star cranking it up again and she would flail around like a fish out of water while I cranked it up and then she would start crying. Now they are battery operated. Just push a button and off they go.

My cousin Debbie is well into her chemotherapy and she seems to be doing good. I saw her last Saturday and her hair fell out and she is wearing the cutest wig. She looks good and say’s she feels good too. I think she has had 2 treatments now. I hope she continues to feel good. I love talking to her. She is so sweet. Chemo is so hard. I just hope it doesn’t get to be too much for her.

My sister Sue’s husbands cousin lost her boy in a hit and run accident the other day. It is just devastating. The guy was drunk. He hit him when he was crossing the street on his bike and then just took off. He left his car in a parking lot and walked home like nothing happened, that is until the police found the car and tracked it to his house. I feel so bad for them. I just can’t imagine what they are going through right now. To lose a child like that must be awful.

I have appointments for my tests to check out that dreaded lump in my right breast. I have a mammogram on Tuesday July 10th, then a MRI on Wednesday the 11th. I am really hoping it is just a cyst. I am trying to live day to day without worrying about it, but trust me it is always in the back of my mind that it could be something again. But how? With all that chemo running through my system how could something grow?

Well I thought it was about time I unveiled the hair. So here it is! Little Jeffrey has as much hair as I do!

Not another lump...

I have been on cloud nine with the baby and being done with treatment. That is until I went to the Oncologist on Tuesday. Everything went good, we talked about the tests I had and how they all came back wonderful, and how I am looking and feeling good. He told me that I wouldn’t have to come back to see him for 3 months and then I would have my tests again. Then he wanted to do a quick exam. He checked all my nodes to make sure there was nothing going on. Poked at my tummy, my neck, under my arm, and then my breasts. He did the left breast that is still sore and burned and raw from radiation and he was very gentle. Then he moved on to my right (the "good" one) and asked me if I have been having any issues with it…..then I told him about the tiny lump I have been feeling very deep near my chest wall. He felt it some more and then said. Yup your right there is something there. Then he sat down with his little pen and started writing stuff down in my file  He looked up and said.. “I am very concerned about this lump”…OH GREAT!!! Way to burst my happy bubble! My mom was with me, and I know she is upset. So now I have a new issue to deal with, not even a week out of final cancer treatment. My celebration has been short lived. I have to go in for a breast MRI and a bilateral mammogram in 3 weeks when my radiation burns heal. I know it’s a long time to wait but I have to heal first. I am at a place right now where I don’t even know what to think or feel. I am really hoping that this turns out to be ok. The thought of going through this again right now nauseates me. I know that I will be living with cancer following me around for the rest of my life, the worrying at every test, but not now! Not so soon! I am so worried.

On a happy note, I am enjoying my little bugaboo baby Jeffrey so much. It is just amazing to me that I am a grandma. Jeff is such a good grandpa too. He comes home from work and washes all the grime off him from the day and goes straight for the baby. We all love him so much. He will not lack for love in his life. Auntie Megan is just in love, Jeffrey’s friend Nick is here all the time to help with him too.

Pam has been coming over and helping me get organized since I haven’t had any organization in my life for 10 months. It is amazing how fast things can go down hill in a house! My basement and laundry room are a mess. Pam is like a cleaning machine. Here she is right now. She just walked in the door! Time to go clean!

I'm a grandma, and put a fork in me, I'm done!

Yay! Bonnie had the baby! What a little cutie poo. He is just adorable. She started having back labor on Wednesday and so about 8:00 Wednesday we took her to the hospital because it was getting pretty intense. They sent her home and said she wasn't dialated. At about 12:15 Jeffrey came running into the kitchen saying Bonnie's water broke, so back we went! She was dialated to 1 so the waiting began. By 3:00 in the morning she was at 2, and by 6 she was only at 4....so we waited...the doctor came in about 8:00 and said she was at 10.  She pushed for 1 hour and 45 minutes and the baby was born at 10:06 Thursday June 14! It was so exciting. I was in the room with her and so was her mom and Jeffrey. I stood by her head and grimased at every push! At one point she look at Jeffrey and in a cute little cry for sympathy said.."why did you do this to me"? She had the death grip on his head and I even saw her grab onto his hair...LOL. Here I am saying.."come on Bonnie, you can do it", (this coming from someone who never pushed out a baby, I had 2 c-sections) and by the last 15 minutes of pushing she was exhausted and saying she couldn't do it anymore. So I said, come on Bonnie get pissed and push that baby out!" She started pushing again and out popped Jeffrey Francis Ehrenberg III. We are all on cloud nine. Megan was so cute, she stood by the window just waiting for us to come out and tell them. Bonnie is still in the hospital, they are coming home Saturday. I can't wait.

Put a fork in me I'm done!  I had my last radiation! That's it! I'm done like dinner. I got a certificate and everything. I am officially done with cancer treatment. Whew, what a feeling. I made it through the good the bad and the ugly. It will be a year on June 24 that I went to the doctor and told her I had a lump in my breast. From there it has been a whirlwind. Now I can sit back, relax, and enjoy my new little grandbaby! Oh how I love him!

Time to party like a rock star!

The Relay, and Megan graduates!

I know it’s been a while. So much has been going on!

 First of all I did the Relay for Life on the 2nd of June. We had a little rain but it was a wonderful day regardless. I got a medal and 1 strand of beads (you get one for every year you are a survivor). I held the banner for the survivor lap and I was fine until I passed my family and looked their way and they were all crying, then I lost it. We walked all the way around the track and then the caregivers join us for another lap. It was very emotional. I made it about halfway around the second lap then I was exhausted! After that I went to the survivor luncheon with Jeff. It was really nice.  My friend Denise who is also a cancer survivor had a shirt on that said, "I am dedicating this relay to Trish Ehrenberg." I was so touched by that. It made me cry. That was so sweet and I think about it every day. I really wish we would have taken a picture together. We had so many people come out to support our team, and we raised a lot of money for cancer. I want to personally thank everyone who donated to my Relay website. It really means a lot to me. Thank you!

Megan graduated on the 7th of June. My little baby girl! She looked so grown up in her cap and gown. The day before I went to her farewell assembly at her school. I sat there waiting for her to walk in with her class, but there she was…peeking from a doorway and waving at me in her cap and gown. I had to choke back the tears when I saw her. She was so happy! I didn’t cry until the band played the Lion King song…lol. The Circle of Life. Oh lord…I pictured the lion king holding up his little cub and it got to me…lolol. Too funny. After that I took her to pizza hut and we met up with some of her friends.

The graduation ceremony went really good and when they said Megan’s name we all cheered like she just won a gold medal! Jeff was yelling, “way to go Iggy!” That’s what he calls her…actually he calls her Iggy Hilton..lol. People always say she looks like Paris Hilton. Now all she needs is a prison outfit and she will really look like her.

Saturday we had her graduation party. I had to have it right away because Jeff and Bonnie’s baby is due July 1st. Her party went great. I got to see all my relatives and friends. It was a beautiful day! So many people came and I was so proud of Megan. Before the party she said, “mom, what am I going to say when people ask me what I am doing now that school’s out?” I told her to hold her head up high and just be honest. She really doesn’t know what she wants to do. She is a great artist so she is thinking of taking some art classes. She has also talked about cosmetology school. She will be just fine. I know she will figure it out soon.

I have my last radiation on Thursday. I can’t believe it! My treatments will finally be over. I have dreamed about this day for months. I am having what they call “boosts” That is when they just focus the radiation on the spot where the lump was removed. I had to have 36 zaps altogether and 8 of them are boosts. I am really sore and peeling but radiation has been a lot easier than chemotherapy. If you look at my picture you can see some of the marks on my chest from the radiation. Now that I look at the picture, Jeffs sunburn looks worse!!

I am really tired all the time but I am actually starting to recover from the effects of the chemo. My knees and hips are not as stiff and I am also getting hair! It is getting really thick too. I colored it the other day to cover the grey and it came out really nice. Can you say…Chi Chi Chi Chia!

Sunday my son's friend asked Megan to play in a co-ed softball game. We went up to the park to watch and when we got there they said that they picther wasn't showing up so Jeff (big Jeff) ended up pitching! It was so fun to watch them play in a game together. Megan did really good! She got 3 hits! And then someone hit it to right field and she actually caught it. She was so funny. She was yelling YAY!!! So was her dad! I loved it. They won too! I hope she plays again.